practicing detachment

A concept I’ve recently been practicing is the idea of “detachment.” What is detachment? It’s the action or process of detaching; separation.

What I have found is detaching myself from a particular goal actually helps me achieve my goal. Allow me to explain to you what I mean.

Being in sales, I’ve always had this lurking sales quota I am supposed to achieve at the end of the month. That daunting, ugly number you have to reach, otherwise your whole life worth is nothing. When you don’t reach it, all of a sudden these negative thoughts start flying into your head. What am I doing with my life? Is sales for me? Do I suck at my job? If you have been in sales, you know what I’m talking about!

I have sold everything from mailing machines, medical devices, to gym memberships. Let me tell you, it’s been really awful. The emotional stress, anxiety, and failure has just about pushed me to the edge. I’ve been fired, been depressed about my job, been yelled at and kicked out. I have pretty much experienced it all.

The problem was I was too attached to my sales goal. I let the sales goal control me and not the other way around. This cloud of stress I built around my quota prevented me from being both present and working in a quality fashion. Goals are stupid, but we have them so let’s figure out how to achieve them without throwing ourselves off a bridge.

I practice the law of detachment. I detach myself from a partiulcar goal I am out to achieve. What quota? My quota is just an imaginary future number that’s irrelevant to my today. Once I started focusing on today, my behaviors, attitude, and habits started to shift.  I started enjoying my work, making money, and felt I was providing value for my clients.

When you are too focused on your end goal, you become sloppy, stressed, and start focusing on all the wrong things. Relax and remember, the universe is working with you. You just have to listen to it and start applying yourself in the correct fashion.

By practicing the following behaviors, I’ve been able to separate myself from my goals:

Managing your energy!

Be concious of the energy you are exerting and practice positivity! Who wants to work with or buy from a stressed out person? Nobody. Exude positivity, receive positivity. Attract what you want by behaving the same way. Make this a habit, not a “I woke up on the right side of the bed today so I guess I’ll be happy today” lifestyle. By operating in a positive manner, your every day life is just going to be easier. Period.

This can take some practice, but become aware of those moments when negative thoughts start to creep your brain. This sort of self-awareness plays a significant role in your growth. When I changed my attitude from ‘maybe I can do it’ to ‘I can and will do it,’ the energy I was exerting into the universe totally transformed. Stop allowing these false and negative images/ideas in your head affect your energy and potential! Your thoughts shape your reality, so make it positive! Remember, the universe doesn’t work FOR you, but THROUGH you. So become the vessel of energy you want to experience and enjoy.

Start being you!

Your company, your boss, and about a million other sales books are going to tell you how to sell or do your job. When I was on the verge of another sales breakdown, my manager said to me, “You got this! I believe in you! How about you stop trying to act like the sales person the company wants you to act like, and just start being yourself?” So I did, what did I have to lose? My energy shifted, I became more confident, and business started coming to me vs. me chasing it down. Why? People like me for me and they can sense when I am not being authentic! I stopped focusing on the skill-sets I sucked at and started excelling/improving in the ones I was a natural at. It suddenly became easier to enjoy the daily workload and not feel attached to this ‘end goal’ that I was constantly chasing after.

Focus on your daily activity!

Place your mind on the current task on hand. What do you need to do now? By simplifying your work load, those feelings of being overwhelmed and overstimulated will start to decrease and in the process, reduce your stress and increase your energy. What you have is right now. What’s going to happen tomorrow or at the end of the month is insignificant and unimportant. What you’ll find is the quality of your work and your life starts to improve –> resulting in goal achievement!


I understand it’s easier said than done to practice the above principles. However, simply by being conscious of them and actively trying to put them in practice will improve your life! I don’t know about you, but I am tired of constantly “chasing goals” and placing heavy expectations on myself. Practicing detachment has significantly changed the quality of my life and my confidence to do amazing things.

Another note I would like to add is, aside from practicing the law of detachment in helping you achieve your goals, it may actually help you realize that a goal of yours was never a goal to begin with. There might be a better opportunity that comes into focus you would have been blind to if you were too clouded with achieving your first goal. Being open and positive will attract other opportunities that will void your current game plans!

What I love about this law of detachment is it can be applied to all areas of your life. Still single? Detach yourself from this goal of “meeting that someone.” Want a new career all together? Focus on today and your activities to get you to that next step. All of sudden, that new opportunity is sitting on your doorstep. I promise you it works! It’s amazing how once we let go of these over-exaggerated expectations in our lives, things suddenly start shaking for us in so many incredible ways.

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